Sara

Sara; I know you wanted me to write something to be read at your services but your timid little Grandsons all grown up now did you prouder that I ever could have, which speaks volumes of their love for you. So I put this here in remembrance of how I felt about you and this wonderful family you allowed me to be a part of.

When your the outsider coming into a family by marriage the first hurtle you have to over come is what will I call the “in laws”. I never had that problem and I can’t explain it to you except from the moment I walked into the lives of my future wives family I was made to feel very comfortable and welcome. And I can sum it up for you in one word; Sara. She had a gift; the gift of making you feel like you were part of her family no matter who you were.

The call to a girl’s house was always very stressful for me, because if you were unlucky (as I often was) the parents would answer. And you’d have to hear the tone on the other end as you asked to speak to the daughter. They always made you feel like you were interrupting there lives with you petty phone call. But not Sara; she would talk to you; and made you feel like an actual person. I called one Sunday night after my first date with Angie because I wanted to see if I could take her out again, but she was not there, she went to Church early for choir practice. But lucky me, Sara answered. Normally I would have asked: “is Angie there?” and then hung up when I found out she was not. But you just don’t get off the phone with Sara that easily. Before I knew what was happening, I had been invited over for cake after Church. My mind was trying to process this. Lets see, I get to go be with this beautiful girl name Angie and eat cake….hmmmm…..I’m IN! But why would a girls parents be so nice to me, I mean I’m hard to get to know and make a bad first impression, why would she ask me to come over? It must be a trap!!! But I went back to Beautiful girl and cake and to make a long story no longer, I went to her house that night a fell in love with not just a Girl but a family. A Family that Sara built.

I look at our family today and I see what Sara has accomplished. Some people will be remembered and their names will be recorded in history books. While the real people that make big difference will not have that honor. Some even say they will be forgotten; but will they? We are all here today because of the people before us, people that lived and loved and passed on themselves to us. We are their legacy. How do we best honor Sara and her legacy, I will get to that. First let me tell you about the family that Sara built.

First off there was Frank, her love for over 59 years. Sara’s job was to be the mouth piece for Frank. I never heard him speak much above a whisper, because Sara took care of that for him. They had been through a lot together; you could see the history in their eyes. But it never crossed their minds to give up or walk away. Because love is patience, love forgives; love is what you cling to when it’s just you two against the world. They were a funny pair, you could go to their house and one would be talking to you about the other and how he or she was driving the other crazy. Frank would do his hand gestures describing Sara’s mouth moving and Sara would tell you about how many times Frank walked up and down the stairs to the basement or stood over her while she did something. But try and take one away from the other or say a cross word to either one of them and see if the other does not jump to their defense. They looked out for one another they were a pair; you can hardly say one of their names with out the other.

Then there is Carolyn. The misunderstood first born of the family (as most first born are), Sara and Carolyn are the definition of Mother and Daughter. Girls I guess are closer to their daddy, just as boys are closer to their mother. Girls are at odds with the mother growing up just as boys are with the dad and it never seems to go away. My sons and I can not be together long before all those old feeling come up, I was always trying to keep them in line while their mother was hugging them and healing there wounds, she was the good cop, I was the bad. I think that was the same relationship Carolyn had with her parents (except in reverse). Carolyn loved her mother and her mother loved her, but I think they misunderstood each other a lot of times (as my sons often misunderstand me). But that does not mean there is no less love, because Sara would have defended Carolyn to the death, if any one ever tried to hurt her. I will say this, in the last few years Sara bragged on her Carolyn to the point it made me (because I can only speak for myself) feel bad that I could not be there to do more. She would go on and on about all that Carolyn was doing for her and how well she was looking after her. Carolyn you did good, you made your mother proud. Carolyn (like her mother) is the most giving person I know, she will never be rich because she would just give it all away. She like her mother will always make you feel worthy; she makes you feel like you’re somebody when you feel like nobody. So Carolyn there is a part of you that is like your mother, the best part.

Next is Angie, she has been called the good sister, the good daughter (and always hated it). But she was called that because she was quiet and stayed in her room a lot when she was growing up. Angie was Daddies little girl when Angie and I were dating. If we asked to do something Sara would say no (because she knew what Frank would say); but then Frank would look at Angie and give in and tell her its okay. This never failed to upset Sara, the bad cop once again (I know how she must have felt). Angie is a balance of her Father and Mother. She is quiet like her father and I’m as scared of her as I was him. She is like her mother in the fact she can put me in my place in two words or less. But like her mother and sister, she will lift you up. She can make you feel worthy when the world has beaten you down. She lives by the rule “if you can’t say anything nice about some one don’t say anything at all” (maybe that’s why she’s so quiet). I have lived with her nearly thirty years and have rarely heard her say a bad or cross word about anyone. Like her mother the only thing that will bring the wrath of Angie down on you is if you mess with her family. If you don’t believe me try it, she may be quiet and unassuming, but say one cross word about her children or anyone in our family and see what happens, I dare ya. Sara taught her well; that family is everything.

This is a Christian family, because Sara was a strong Christian Woman. She was the type of woman that would take her children to church regardless. She did not drop them off or send them on a bus; she took them even if it meant doing it alone. I think what she missed most in these last years was not being able to go to Church, something we take to lightly and for granted.

I could go on and on about this family, I could tell you the influence that Sara had on her Grandchildren, but I would not know where to begin or when to stop. Each one of her Grandchildren has had their battles to face and fight, but they have landed on there feet because of the firm foundation of this Christian family. If I could sum up for you Sara’s influence on them, I would say look at the wives they chose, get to know them. And you will see another generation of strong Christian women that will help keep us men in line. They chose them because Sara paved the way and was the example.

Sara was more than a mother in law to me; she was a friend I could talk to. I picked on her all the time and she gave me just as good as I sent. From the moment I first met her, she got me. She understood this weird guy and was just trying to make up for his awkwardness by being funny and silly. Thank you Sara, for always making me feel comfortable and at home, I will truly miss our verbal sword play.

When we first moved to Mississippi our parents always came out to visit about every other month. My Mom and Dad would ride with Sara and Frank or visa versa. They all got to be good friend through the years, it made our families closer. As the years went on the visits got fewer and fewer as they got older. That is the worst part about living out of our home state; the visits get fewer from family. Then there is that question; when are you moving back? There is no simple answer; but don’t judge our decision about it until you have walked in our shoes. It hurt every time I had to answer that question when it came from my Mother or Sara, every time. We moved out here thinking the company I was with would move me back in two years. They sold out and I’ve had to change jobs more than I can count; almost twenty years have passed. I would not wish my career on anyone and I hope you never have to live so far away from someone you love so much just to keep a job. These last years I have had to see the hurt in Angie’s eyes because she could not be with her Mama and Daddy more. I know because I went through the same with my parents. I know our parents knew we loved them and we did the best we could, but there is a part of me that will regret not being there. We visited all we could, all our vacations are used going to Georgia and it never got easier when we had to leave…. “Call me when you get home”; would always be the last word we would hear from our families when we would leave to come back to Mississippi. In the last six years the number has gone down on the people we had to call. We got home this last time and it hit us hard that Sara was not there for us to call…..

For now we will have to try and move on with out her. She has left this womb of time and has been born into a new world, where she will not hurt or feel pain again. But most of all she will now be reunited with the loved ones already there. Our job is to stay behind a carry on with out her and pass on her legacy. How do we honor Sara? By doing our part to see that her prayers are all answered. Sara loved God, faith was a part of her; the strongest part. Her body was weak and it failed her many times, but I never heard her blame God or get upset with Him for the lot she drew in this life. She has prayed for us all that we would be the Christians God can use. That we would stand on the promises when all else is crumbling around us. She prayed this for us because she knew it is the only way to make it though this life and come out on the other side and be completely free. So my challenge to myself and I make to the rest of the family; let’s honor Sara and pass on her love to the generations to come, until we go home and get to see her again. I know she will be waiting with a big hug for us all.

P.S. Sara; I’m sorry I broke my promise to you; please understand I could not help it I had to make a living. I could wish we had stayed in Georgia, but look at all the good that happen when we moved. The boys grew up in the country became men and a chain of events lead them to their wives. I know you wanted me to bring Angie home and I failed because I ran out of time. But the day is coming and we will come home to you, then we can be together forever…..I promise.

We Wish You A Merry Christmas

Its almost Christmas Day......12/25/2008

But first comes Christmas Eve......12/24/2008

Before that Christmas Adam......12/23/2008

No matter how fast the years go by, and I get older not younger, my hart still skips a beat when I think of Christmas Morning! When I was a child I could not wait to see the shiny new toys. My first year of marriage I could not wait to see my wife smile as she open every present. When I became a Daddy I loved watching my boy's bright faces when they open their gifts from Santa. When I became a father in law I saw my sons joyful harts when they made their wives smile on Christmas morning. Soon there will be two more reasons to look forward to Christmas day. God is good, he got us through another hard year, answered prayers and blessed us with a gift of new life's in the year to come.

What Child is this? God came to earth as a baby, wore flesh just as we do, he then pointed the way home and said; "follow me".

We give gifts, to honor Him and His perfect gift. For a moment we stop being selfish and give for the pure joy of it. Just as our Lord did once upon a Christ Born Night.

Gifts should not come from the wallet on Christmas day or be a burden because you had to pay. So take thought of what you get to give and wrap in pretty ways, because only gifts that come from the hart, will bring joy now and always!

Merry Christmas

THE END

I just wanted to say a big:

THANK YOU!

To the few that read my story blog.

It was fun using us as characters in the story, of coarse it is easier to write about people you know. But it was just a story so don't read to much into any thing I said or done or what happen to the family in the story. It was just that; a story.

But I would suggest you take serious some of the things I found as I researched this story, all the hyperlinks to stuff that is happening right now, today.

It is our world, we have to take care of it, so keep your eyes open and your mind sharp.

Thanks again for reading and if you have not read it and would like to....

click

As I Walk......notes to my past self

then follow the "Go To's" until it leads you back here and then you will have read the whole story.

See ya bye

Buster

P.S. if you have finished the story, please leave a comment and let me know what you think. If its a good comment...Great, if not, I don't care!

An Example

Some of us look a life time for someone to look up too, because in today’s world people like that are hard to find any more. Some are lucky to have a parent they admire, if not when they're young maybe later in life when eyes are more open to scarfices made. Some look to the popular or famous as ones they strive to be like. They see the glamour and assume that they must be so famous because they are a great person. But the higher we hold people up the more likely they are to disappoint. We long to find a hero on this earth, but the days of hero’s is long past I fear.

I know of one that I have long admired and have strived to be like and one I try not to disappoint. She will never be famous, crowds will never scream her name, and history books will never record all that she has done and the lives she has touched. But to those who know her and the few that will take time out of their selfish lives to just talk to her, will find no better person, friend or Christian on this earth than her.

To say she is my hero is an understatement. She always has words of praise on her lips ready to speak them when ever you need encouragement. She never dwells on the negative, because she chooses to see the positive side of life. She has made our house a home no matter how many times we moved or were uprooted. Our children were never void of hugs, kisses or love; she always had plenty to go around.

Today is her birthday and I wish her a very happy one even though I will not be there. You are and will always be the love of my life!

Happy Birthday Angie

I love you!

The Journey Home

Just one more check to make sure I have everything; I never know how long one of these journeys will last. Let’s see, it looks like I have all I will need, I just pray that I’m fully prepared for what lies ahead. I pull my pack on and grab the walking stick by the door. As I open it I am surprised by someone already standing in the door way. Where are you going? He asks. I’m going to find my Son and bring him home. You are, he says in a some what sarcastic way. Yes; I am and you’re in my way. The stranger points at the chair inside and tells me to sit, he has something he must tell me. His tone alarms me; I feel the blood drain from my face. Has he come to tell me something bad has happen to one of my family, does he know something about my son? My hart beats fast as I awkwardly walk backwards to the chair and sit down never taking my eyes off the man before me.

His gaze makes the moments last forever, I fear he will never talk so I give in to the urge to fill the silence with words. You know I'm losing daylight, it’s a long walk to hell and I fear my son will not find his way out if I’m not there. You have time he says, you have time. But you don’t understand the hour is desperate and I must be on my way. All is as it should be, he say’s. How can you say that, I'm telling you, you just don’t understand.... Oh, I more than understand and I know how desperate you feel, but what do you think you can do? The stranger said in a quizzical tone. I told you, I can go to him I can bring him out, bring him home to all those who love him. And how will that help? He said again. By now my temper is rising, I can see out the window the sun is getting dimmer and dusk is on its way, I was planning on being at the gates by now. How will that HELP, are you daft, are you not listening. That’s all I have done, he said; or at least that’s what you think I have always done. But I have more that listen to you I have answered you; you have just got to learn to be patient. I, I, d-d-d-don’t understand; I stuttered.

Speaking of daft, he chuckled. Sorry, I could not resist. You see, your doing what you always do, you’re trying to fix things. Trust me there is nothing out there you can fix. Tell me, on your walk through hell, did anyone come to get you? No, I said. Were your prayers answered when you cried out for relief? No, again was my response. What happened, what had you learned once you found your way home? He asked. I paused and thought for a moment. Well, I began, I learn to trust my path, my sense of direction, because I realized even the road through hell leads home if you keep walking and focus on the horizon. Why the horizon? He asked. Because that is where you will always find the Son. Sometimes He’s not in sight and you feel the darkness closing in but if you walk long enough you will catch up to His light. Sounds like you learn a valuable lesson, he said. To keep walking with your eyes on your future. If that was what you learned on your journey, imagine what your son will learn on his. But, I said; I can hear him crying out, he needs me. No your wrong the stranger said; he needs me! Then, I said; why are you here with me and not with him? One day you will see; he said. One day your eyes will open and you will see.

The stranger walk to the door to leave, I tried to think of more questions I could ask him. He stopped as he open the door and looked my way and said. I will help you out maybe my words will calm you. All walk through hell; I did. Each journey is different and sometimes it has to be repeated, you should know that. But for those who trust in me this journey always leads home. See even now, if you look hard enough you will see your son has turned the corner and is on his way home as we speak. I understand my Lord; I guess I understand. But Lord, I asked; why did I think you a stranger? Because at times, I am to you, he said. You got to stop guessing, your know the truth, believe and have faith. You’ll get there, just keep walking, just keep walking, his words faded as he did from my sight. It was then I saw my son, he was on his way back home where is future is as bright as the Son just over the horizon.

Climbing a mountain, WHY?

A week or so ago I got out of my comfort zone and climb a mountain. I love adventure, a challenge, to see what’s around the next bend to walk in woods not seen by most. As long as it cost me no time, effort or money. I love to watch it on TV, I love the idea, but putting foot to fantasy is another thing all together. So I did it, got out all by my self and went on a hike in the woods. I got to the park all alone (I hate doing anything alone), there were people all around, I almost turn around and left. But I got out, put my pack on my back and with walking stick in hand I set out to climb.

I hate my inside job, I often think of all the things going on in the world outside as I stair at a computer all day. How did man, the great conqueror, builder of nations, sailor of sea’s explorer of new worlds, get reduced to a worker bee in a factory? The industrial revolution cost man his soul for adventure. We took the pride out of creating something with your two hands and made craftsmen into bolt turners and assembly line workers. There are now only a few men and women left that do the great challenges any more, because it takes money and sponsors to climb big mountains or do great adventures. The big adventures are gone for the average Joe, no more wild areas to tame no more last frontiers. Our biggest challenge is getting off our butts and doing something we dream of.

So I climb a big hill, it’s not a mountain by Rockies standards but it seem big to me at the time. As I climb it got steeper and steeper until I did all I could do. So I stop and sat on a rock. I looked out over a valley and thought to myself, this is why you do this. To see clearer that any high definition TV could see, Gods creation. The rest of the day I was on a high, I felt elated and I did not even reach the top. So I will go back and try another day, the mountain will be there tomorrow, the question is will I. Life is too short not to live, so I will keep trying for the pinnacle. That’s the neat thing about climbing a mountain. Its hard work, every step upward is tough, you’re completely out of breath, but when you reach the top it is all worth while, because you can see forever.

The year is flying by.........

It is September of 2008, can you belive that? When I was a child 2008 would have seem so far off that I would have never dreamed I would have lived that long, yet here I am. The years have flown by, so much has happen, and I have done so little. I had so many dreams when I was younger, few have come true. But I have reached an age now were that does not bother me any more, because I have all I need and far more than I deserve. Now I just want a simple life, the ability and time to enjoy it.

The other day I was up early going to work, I was rushing to get ready because I had gotten up late and was running behind according to a clock (an object that seems to push me so). I ran out the door of my apartment an rush to drop a letter in the mail box. As I went to get in the truck, I saw movement and looked up. A deer was walking down the pavement of the parking lot. When he saw me he moved off to join his friend in the grass. They both watched me (and I watch them) as I drove off. They looked puzzled and I seem to hear them say, where are you going in such a rush? Stay and play, why do you hurry about? Don't you understand God supplies all our needs there is no need to worry.

I wondered, where all did the deer walk that day, what all did they see as I was stuck inside a building at work? Did they see the clouds move across the sky as they laid in the grass to sleep in the warmth of the sun? Did they see a tree fall in the forest as it made a sound no one heard but them? Were they the first to feel the drops of rain as it slowly fell that afternoon and brought freshness to the world outside? Did they live while I existed?

The days rush by, time goes by faster every year, I pray someday for time to explore the questions above, out where no clocks hang on a wall.........

Looking past the Surface.

How much time to you spend getting to know someone? In a world where we have to make a good first impression with in the first few minutes of when we meet someone, you just don’t have much of a chance any more. Me, I’m very hard to get to know, some would say impossible. But those that take time to know me better, may find that I’m nothing like what they thought I was when they first met me. Notice I did not say I was good to know as you learn me and my personality, just different.

Here comes the Judge……….I wish I could stop making judgments about people when I know nothing about them. I can sum up someone in the first few minutes of laying eyes on them. And most of the time, I am wrong. But sometimes I’m right, so I keep on judging. Many people have much depth to them, so you have to look beyond the surface. And old Indian proverb once said: You can not judge a man until you have walk a mile in his moccasins. So walk with someone today and get to know them before you drop the gavel and pass judgment; you might be surprise what is beneath the surface of most people.

We are all afraid

There are times when we are all afraid, to face the next year, next week, next day or the next hart beat. We all live with fear, how we handle it is up to us. But with out God the fear can consume us. Some, it eats them up and they change. Many become mean and spiteful, lashing out at everyone just to protect themselves from any one finding out how scared they are. Some turn inward and hold it all inside, just knowing they are the only one that feels this way. Some ignore it and move on and never look back and therefore never understand what makes them so cold and why they never get close to any one. Then some turn to God and embrace the fear and submit to the fact that they can not handle it with out him.

Fear can be a demon that haunts you. Fear can be a friend that tells you when to run. But don’t be afraid to live, because of fear. It is not there to keep you from living but to help you realize when you are living. When you hart beats fast because of fear, you are alive. Maybe that’s why we look for the thrill, the next roller coaster ride, because when our stomach goes up in our throat and our harts beats out of our chest, we live again.

The fear of death is the greatest fear of all. What will happen? Where will I go? I don’t want to die!!! This is one fear that will come true, you will die. But when, is up to you. You can chose to die of fear and spend a life time dead to the world all around you. Or you live with fear and understand your not the only one. When you learn to live with it, you can help others and pull them out of the fear. And then maybe, just maybe you both will learn to live and embrace fear and not be afraid.

If I could only take my own advice, maybe I would not be so fat. We all deal with fear in different ways, we all have our battles. I hope some day I can help someone; help them realize we are all the same, we are all afraid. Then maybe they will help me too. Will it be you, will you fight beside me, can we draw swords together? I can’t do this alone, God insist we do it together. I wait by the battle lines, I wait for you.

It’s all about Me, Myself and I

It is a shame that I have to put up with those pesky “other” people. You know the ones I’m talking about, the kind of people that have the nerve to drive on the road at the same time I am. I try to get them to move over out of my way. I ride their bumper flash my lights, it just my way of letting them know (in as nice a way as I can) that their in my fast lane reserved for me. Another thing happens when I go to the store. I go in; no one is at the check out area, and then after I find my purchases and proceed to check out, everyone decides to check out at the same time as I. What’s up with that? Don’t they see it’s me, but I have to stand in line and wait my turn just like everyone else (it’s hard being me). So I decide to pull out my cell phone and make a call, because everyone wants to talk to me as well as hear me talk to others on my phone. The clerk can wait as I talk; besides I don’t have time for pleasant conversation with a stranger, I have my friends to talk to on my phone, (can’t they understand that).

One perk about being me that comes in handy at the store is those nice non marked parking spaces right on the curb in front of the store. I don’t know why more people don’t use them (I guess because they know it’s reserved for me). And if there is not enough curb to park on, I can always use those parking places with the handicap sign. After all it is a handicap if you have to walk as far as those other people to get in the store (no one uses them half the time any way, I mean really how many people in a wheelchair go shopping at the same time).

Another perk I enjoy is people that hold the door open for me, it’s a shame I never have time to return the favor. I have often thought about saying a kind word or maybe a thank you when people do this for me, but my personal life is always so demanding, you know I’m constantly on the phone. I'm sure those people understand, after all it’s me.

When I go to church I pray for all the bad people, that God would bless them and make them more like me (if I have time left in my prayer after I get through asking that all my needs are met). I would give more at church, but I like to know were my moneys going. I like to make sure it will benefit to me if I going to give, It’s just good stewardship. I make it a point to help others when I can, as long as they believe like me.

About me and my home life, I know you want to know, after all this is about me. My pet is more important to me than most people, because my pet is nicer than humans! Don’t you find that to be true? My pet gives me so much love. So I feed it, give it a place to live, pick up it's poop and pet it all the time (I don’t have time to treat people that nice). Another nice thing about pets (at least mine anyway), they always lick their little butts clean after they do there little business, always licking themselves clean. I like it when they lick my face in appreciation for all I do. They deserve a nice kiss on the mouth don’t you think?

I have come up with a list of things I think people should understand about me;
#1: When I am sick, no one is sicker!
#2: Number one also goes for my family! (So I should always get top priority at Doctors offices, hospitals and pharmacy)
#3: When I’m talking, what I am saying supersedes any drivel that comes out of your mouth!
#4: Nothing is more important than what I am doing at any given time!

Oh enough of that I don’t have time for list I have got better things to do. Let me just sum it up for you. It’s my world I hope you can learn to live in it! What a wonderful world this would be if only more people could be like me!

Divided, we never get any thing done.

If people could learn to work together we would be surprise at what we could accomplish, but we don’t. Why? I don’t know I’m asking you! So if you don’t know either then here are my ramblings on the subject. It is a divine design less we think too much of ourselves, and think we are god. Ever read the Tower of Bable story…….I read it as a kid in my picture bible and thought more about it then, but as an adult I just gloss over it when I reading through. But we need to give it a think…….


Genesis 11:1-9 (New International Version)
1 Now the whole world had one language and a common speech. 2 As men moved eastward, they found a plain in Shinar and settled there.
3 They said to each other, "Come, let's make bricks and bake them thoroughly." They used brick instead of stone, and tar for mortar. 4 Then they said, "Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves and not be scattered over the face of the whole earth."
5 But the LORD came down to see the city and the tower that the men were building. 6 The LORD said, "If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them. 7 Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other."
8 So the LORD scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. 9 That is why it was called Babel because there the LORD confused the language of the whole world. From there the LORD scattered them over the face of the whole earth.


We (God’s creation) like to think we can do anything and we can, but not with out God. That is our problem we like to get the credit and praise because we are our own little god we like to worship. If we as a world could come together and put or minds to it we could end so much wrong in the world. But we can’t because we are to busy looking at and pointing out our differences and fighting over it, that we do nothing. As our world gets smaller in these modern times and we are brought together more, we have done wonderful things, but greed has kept it from benefiting anyone. So we babble on and do nothing….just as planed so long ago.


So why does the church (believers in one God) not do more for this world? If we could come together, work together, and follow the great commission…..how much wonderful work could we do for God? But we don’t. Why? Once again if you have no answer I will chime in. Well I believe the one we battle against has done his own thing to confuse the church and keep us divide. The Body of Christ which should be one church is divided up into denominations. We each have what we believe and focus on that, instead of what we have in common….Christ! I don’t know how it happened and I have often wondered. How the Church in Acts, which work together and had all things in common, through the years got to be the First (insert denomination) Church of the what ever section of town it’s in. The devil did it…….well I don’t know for sure, but he is the author of confusion. So you have to be careful and make sure you’re not confused. And the best way to do that is this. Read the bible for your self! Pray as you read! And let the Holy Spirit speak to you and guide you to a church were you can be of service.

The Church is not only your local denomination, or mega feel good church of non committal. There is only one body of Christ, His church because this body BELIEVES He is the Son of God and salvation comes only through HIM! There is only one Church and if it could focus on what we agree on and stop auguring about what we disagree on, what a wonderful world it would be…..for GOD!

All Christians have God in Common and this we can share with others….....
Changing the world is as easy as reaching to the person beside you!

Out of my hands…..

I remember as if it was yesterday, the day I took on the awesome responsibility of being somebody’s dad. My first born was placed in my hands fresh out of his mother’s womb and it hit me like a ton of bricks. God has placed this life in my hands to raise and provide for and keep safe…..how can I do this God; I wanted to cry out. How can I do this indeed? They say it takes a village to raise a child, I don’t know about that, but my wife and I soon found out we could not do it alone. We both had parents that jump into service when ever needed, but even they could not be there all the time. And believe me being a parent is an all the time job. So we enlisted the help of one that would be there all the time….GOD.

My wife was born to be a mother; it came to her as naturally as breathing, me I was not good at the baby stage, I would take over later. But I could not help but take control when those little hands reached out for me. "I’ll hold your hand my little one, it’s what I do, cause I’m your Daddy". Those trusting little hands….how soon they grow.

Then comes the time when thy want to pull those little hands away from you and run away. But there only two years old so you hold on tight to keep them from running into traffic. Even if that little hand turns blue you hold on for all your worth as the years go by.

One day though you have to trust those hands that grew up as you held on. And you have to let go. After all this is the day you prayed for this is why you ask God for help. Now it’s time, because if you keep holding on tight you will lose them anyway. So you let go and watch as they grow up before your eyes.

So thank you God for answering my prayers and taking over as my hands failed through out the years. You raised my children up to be true sons of there Father in heaven. You proved it to me again today as you reach into my son’s hart and heal him. The doctor and nurses were there, but I know who’s hand did the work. How can I say thanks, my Lord….how can I say thanks……..
There is a time for every purpose under heaven.........

29 Years…….

…………Is a long time you would think, but it has gone by in the blink of an eye for me and my love. Some don’t believe in praying, they say prayers don’t get above the roof. But I have seen prayers answered, because mine has a name……Angie. She walks at peace with all because she would rather praise you than say a cross word to any one. Her smile will heal your hurt and her touch is as calming as a slow rain on a summer afternoon. Her beauty flows from her and engulfs you so that all you see is her warm face and deep eyes full of love. She is envied by the stars because no one sees them when she is around. My love walks this earth with the grace of an angel, but heaven is her home. God allowed her to touch my life and she has change my world. I can live because of her, she is my other half, I am complete only when she is near. I hold her tight because I remember the darkness before I found her. She fills our home with her sweet fragrance and our children bloom and flourished because of the hope she speaks of and the faith she confirms.

I have been blessed with 29 years by her side and look forward to many more if My God wills it. I don’t understand eternity, my mind is to small. But I know this, a wonderful soul like my loves is forever, she believes the Son. And if I’m allowed and if heaven is all I dream, I will be by her side as we praise God together for the next 29 years and forever after when time is no more.

Happy June 16th Angie; Thanks for marrying me!

My Three Son’s

And so it’s that time of year again…..
Hey Dad….happy fathers day! It’s a call I look forward to getting this time every year. Long distance, it’s bad to be this far away from your children when they live in another state. But there grown, all married. Two live out of state, one still close by, but all out on there own none the less. So when the phone calls have been received and the cards all opened and it’s quite now I travel back in time and remember when…..

It’s Sunday morning, I hear dishes rattling in the kitchen and little voices whispering. My wife sticks her head in the bedroom door and say’s “don’t you dare get up”! Soon the door opens and three little boys carry in wobbly plates on a tray and present it, just like they really did all the cooking. Happy Fathers day Daddy! They have cards and presents to give me, but the smiles and laughter is really all I need.

Those years went by to fast, I wish I would have cherish them more, wish I could do it all again. But I can’t, I have to be satisfied with the job I done raising my three sons. I was not a perfect father; I had a bad temper and reacted to quickly sometimes. My wife was the balance that kept it all in line. Those little boy’s soon became teenagers and like all that age, wanted to get away. At that age the grass is always greener and your parents just don’t get you at all. I said things to my parents when I was an “all that teenager”; I wish I could take back. My kids did my wife and I the same. But you forget because they did not mean it, just like you did not mean it when you were that age. We go through it all together, because that’s what a family does.

Time is short, and your time is limited when you get older, it’s just a fact. So now when I have time with my family, I soak it all in, enjoy every moment. I take to many pictures and way to much video, but I just want to hold on to it all, cause it all changes and time fades it away. You see I still want to walk over to the phone to this day and pick it up and dial those familiar numbers…….hey Buster, Happy father’s day! I held my wife today as tears rolled down her cheek, because this is the first year she will not be able to make that same call to her father. Enjoy it while you can, talk even though you have nothing to say.

I am very lucky; my three sons tell me often how good a father I was and what a great dad I am. If that is true, it is because I had three great little boys that grew up to be men I can call my friends. They each picked wonderful women to marry and our family is very blessed. We enjoy time together and life is good; and some day soon my boys will pass own to their children the love from generations passed.

Thank ya boys, it’s been a great ride so far!

Paradise

Jimmy and Mary were quite a pair back in their younger days
They met a married in six weeks time and
That was sixty years ago this May
Four kids made a house a home and a love for Jesus kept them strong
Now every morning at eight A..M.. Jimmytakes a drive through town
He spends his days at Mary's side
In a home for the old and broken down
With a cane in his lap and a Bible in his hand
He reads her stories about the promised land
And with tears in their eyes they dream of a place
Where everything changes in the light of Jesus' face and
That's paradise...

These opening lyrics to the Steven Curtis Chapman song Paradise reminds me of two special couples I have known in my life. So this is dedicated to these old saints that stuck it out through thick and thin, that walk the long walk through life. They did what that had to do for God and family and complain very little. The good times came along and the bad times ate them up, but they kept on going. Their feelings hurt when the kids they bore did not appreciate the sacrifices made, but stood proud with a tearful eye when they spread their wings and flew away. Prayer got them through this life, forgiveness and faith made it all bearable. A commitment made was a commitment kept, so giving up was not a option, they hung in there together until death do they part. If I could write a book and tell their story, it would not begin to even touch on the way these two couples touched my life. So the reward they dream of is now reality for all but one. Enjoy paradise, you’ve earn it!

Merl and Elizabeth, Frank and Sara, I sure were quite the pairs back in there younger days.....


Fathers day always make me think of Buster and the perfect gift I always wanted to give him but never found. So this is my little tribute to my Mom and Dad and my wife’s Wonderful Parents.

Destined to Repeat

They say that if we forget history it is destined to repeat it’s self. I believe we have reach that point. Someone came to me and several others standing around and asked “ the depression was after world war 2 wasn’t it? When did WW 2 start any way?” I was taken back and said . "The depression was before WW2 it ran from 1929 after the stock market crash until the late thirties and brought this nation to its knees. And remember Perl Harbor a date the will live in infamy December 12th 1941, jezz man, remember your history"!! How soon we forget, how soon we get comfortable.

I have long believe we are headed to another depression, and this nation will not be able to handle it today. I have nothing to base this on, because I am no economist. It’s just a feeling I have, based on people like the person above and a younger generation that has forgotten where we came from. History is important when it comes to lessons learn, so we don’t repeat our mistakes. It’s kind of like your work, if you made a mistake, that’s fine you learn and move on, but when you repeat the same behavior and get the same mistake and repeat it again and again that’s foolishness. How many nations have gone to war, with nothing gain but death and destruction…..yet we still use war to solve problems. How many civilizations have grown, become a great power, have it all, their people live in prosperity and then they fall and disappear into soon forgotten history.

Lest we forget…. But I would not worry, why should we. We live in a great nation that has it all. We can drive to work in our bigger than life SUV and fill up our tanks at 60 plus dollars a pop. Why walk or ride bikes, that’s beneath us, any way our city planers have long forgot about sidewalks and bike paths. Because who has the time, got to go, got to get to work, got to make money to buy more stuff. And when we do have time to enjoy nature, so we must buzz by it on our four wheelers or fly over the still water on our jet ski. Who has time to walk in the woods and hear a stupid bird sing or a squirrel play in the leafs.

The next depression and why I fear it? Here’s why, we are to soft today. Our little white collar country has sold it’s soul (the crafts and trades and skill that takes hard work) to the rest of the world. Our farmers and farms are no longer family business but corporations. We don’t kill an eat, we buy and consume. My Dad once told me that during the depression if they had not been able to raise there own food and kill there own live stock they would not have survived. You see they were one of the lucky families, they had a farm to move to. They lived in the city when the depression hit and soon lived in poverty. Until my grandmothers father gave them a farm he had and they moved the family to it and work it to keep them in food. But many were not so lucky, the ones that lived in the city. They had to walk and walk from town to town to find work. Our country step in and put many to work. They used those out of work hands to build, national parks, dams and roads, that are still here today.

So, can you imagine having to go out in the back yard wring a chickens neck, dress it and cook it for tonight’s meal. Heck we don’t have the time or energy to cook any more, just stop buy McDonalds on the way home. To soft, to lazy, to busy and to forgetful, we are. Me to, I’m a product of a generation that prospered after WW 2. We boomed into this world and still think we are all that. I’ve watch my generation take it all for granted and it gets worst with each one that follows. I’m sure the same thing happen in Rome, before it burn. Dooms day is coming? Did not mean to say that, we are smart enough today not to let our country, our great nation disappear. We are smarter right? Oh, by the way I had the above date wrong. December 7th 1941 is the date that will live in infamy. I’m so sorry, Mr. Roosevelt, I guess infamy is to short of a time for our memories. I’m so ashamed………

I'm not that old...am I

The worst part about getting old is looking in the mirror and not recognizing the person staring back at you. "Who is that old guy that looks like my Dad?" I did not want to wined up like I did and did not want to feel like I feel. I hurt most all the time. My back hurts my feet hurt, the list gets longer every day. I still feel like the kid that wanted to take on the world, fly helicopters, fight forest fires and be the friendly park ranger. But now I older and did what I had to, to keep food on the table for my family. Now they are grown and I'm feeling to old to do what I wanted to do. I have abused my body and it is catching up with me. I still want to walk the adventure trail, see what's around the next bend on a rushing river. Maybe I will get better, but it's hard form me to trust Doctors, it's hard to find one that cares. So I put it off and hope and pray that if I do this or that it will get better.

I look down at my feet and they belong to my Dad, my hands look like his. I have the skin tags growing on me just like he use to have. I am his age now when I work with him in his shop as a teenager. Dad work two jobs most of his life, then had his own business when I work with him and it was all I could do to keep up with the old gent. Me a teenager and him in his mid fifties. How come I feel older, what have I done to get to this point. To much self indulgence, to much not taking care of me. I look after my car better that I do my body. Maybe I can change, maybe I have no choice any more. I want to be young as I get older. Then with my wife by my side we'll skip off into as many adventures as we can think of, until I can go home and reverse it all! Someday I'll have a new body, praise the Lord!

My Sons Hart

I’m so sorry you have to go through this surgery, if I could do it for you I would! I hate to see a young man like you go through this. All I can do is pray that you find the right Doctor and that this surgery corrects the problem so you never have to deal with it again. All I can do is pray………why did I say it like that, habit I guess. We have access to the most powerful being in existence, the God and father of all, one who loves His children and wants to give them all good things. But this womb of time we live in is not perfect and bad things happen to good people and bad people seem to get away with murder. But this is our proving ground, our moment of growth and development until we are ready to be born into eternity. So now your facing some troubling times ahead, and how you deal with it and how your family gathers around you will brings us closer to God if we trust Him. I Placed you in his hands long ago, and I have watch as He has work in your life. Are you a model and perfect Christian, maybe not, no one is, but the difference is made in the HART!! And you have a beautiful HART, your fleshly hart may have a flaw, but your True Hart is a wonderful gift from God because you have been a blessing in my life and I know a lot of other life’s as well.
All I can do is pray…..maybe so, but my Father in heaven puts a thousand angels to work at the whisper of my voice, and The God of everything puts things in motion that I can not see with my earthly eyes. How will it all work out, I don’t know, but I trust Him, because He brings the good and the bad to shape us into what He wants us to be. Be the clay in the muddy river bank that is pushed around by the water, but when in the hands of the Master potter becomes a beautiful vase that flowers bloom from.

WHO HAVE I HURT?

I wonder who have I hurt in my travels through this life time of mine. Who all have I cut into with my sharp wit and missed used tong. I think of the time I have felt hurt that came from others who looked upon me with a critical eye. And with either sharp or dull wit they cut me into and my hart was hurt with my feelings left bleeding all over the floor. I have been called many things in my life, and every time it hurts. Oh I try not to show it as they pick out some flaw of mine or mistake I made and bring it to light in front of others. Oh the joy we get when we can point at others and say “look at them, don’t you see”. And in doing this we think, they want look at me and my flaws. Some say I’m sensitive, because my feelings do get hurt from time to time. But you would think this would stop me from hurting others and you would think wrong.

Who have I left behind in the wake of my destructive tong? How many have I hurt and cut until they bled? The mouth, made to edify God and the tong made to praise the eternal one. Can be use to destroy His creation. We can say proudly we never killed any one. But how many sprits have you broken, how many dreams have you shattered, with one cutting remark or roomer spread. I know I have done my share of damage. I have hurt love ones, people closest to me that trusted me to only say good nurturing things, but I hurt them with my evil words. Things said in hast, that the word sorry can never erase. Then there are the everyday acquaintances, people I work with, that thought I was someone special for awhile until I lashed out at them or cut them in jest just because I could. Yes my wit is sharp at times, to sharp. And then less not forget the strangers I have cut with my blade of justice.

So what right do I have to get my feelings hurt, what right indeed! For on my pilgrimage through this life my walk has not been a straight one, I have wondered off the path and let my feet travel in the darkest parts of this world and in doing so have lead many astray. So what can I do to amend? All I can do is control my evil mouth when I can and think before I open it. If I can’t think of a positive thing to say, then maybe I should have never learned to talk at all. But this is easier said then done. Because I will always try to out draw the other person with my wit, this way I can disarm them before harm befalls me, seems like I am destine to hurt others and in turn get hurt also. This is an insane cycle, it must be stop. I pray one day before I die all the good things I have said to others will far out weigh the hurtful words I have spoke into the cold air of this life.